TURBO NEWS NETWORK: Take time to stop and smell the bacon . . . . . . . . .

Monday, December 31, 2007

No Tamales For Turbo?!


My stupid Human has informed me that she will not be giving me any of the tamales she will be cooking with her stupid friend tomorrow! That is yet another injustice!
She will be cooking up 8 pounds or so of stupid pork roast tonight...

She says she's not going to share that either!

I'm not talking about the stupid tamales anymore. She'll post about it on her stupid blog if you're interested.

Here's the stupid graphic she designed for the occasion:


The meat was cooked thoroughly. Then my stupid Human had to ruin it with chili seasoning and cumin!

Sunday, December 30, 2007



The Humans Are Watching!


Dog and Hamster friends: Please be aware that the humans are watching us and monitoring our blogs!

I say "who cares?!"

Saturday, December 29, 2007



I just found out that I'm not being invited to participate in the next Presidential debate! I am outraged!

I saw an article that all of the candidates had accepted the offer and I had to say, "What the woo?!" True enough, I'm not a Democrat or a Republican. I am a proud member or the Sibertarian wing of the Dogmacrat Party.

I demand that my message be heard!

Husky Logo #51


Hey! It's time to resume my Husky Logo chronicling. Woo!

Today I'm featuring the Howard Huskies Hockey Club. I love hockey as much as any husky, so I was pleased to find this organization. And they are located in Merryland, so maybe my friends in that fine state can go check them out. On the right is a picture of Howie the Husky. He seems like a pretty cool guy. He says his favorite activity is chasing cats!

On the left is a the Howard Huskies logo. I like that the husky has the hockey stick in his mouth. That husky is running away with a hockey stick he probably broke. Way to go Howard Husky!

Friday, December 28, 2007

Winter Deck


I have decided to resume my posting of husky logos. For my newer readers, I used to do this every Saturday. I think I'll probably resume this that day.

In the mean time, here's some photos.

Rooie and I looking at the north side of the house.

Meeps and Rooie looking west at a stupid cat...khat.

Meeps, alone, looking at the stupid cat.

Thursday, December 27, 2007

New Khampaign Slogan!


Thankhs to my Khampaign Khoordinator I have a new slogan.

A Word From My Human


My Human requested that I allow her to impart some information to my audience. I reminded her that she has her own blog that she never uses, but she said my audience was much bigger. There's this TV show that she likes called Mad Men. It's on a channel called AMC. My Human promised one of the actors on his blog that she would publicize the show. The show is about a bunch of humans who work at an advertising agency in 1961. My Human likes the show so much that she will actually get off the computer and sit down and watch the show. Anyway, here is my Human...

Thank you, Turbo, for the introduction. I recommend Mad Men for viewing for people who like a well written drama. I started watching the series after a few episodes had aired, so there couple that have not seen. The show also has a lot of visual appeal with its many period details. Not all of the characters are admirable (just like real people), but all of them are interesting. As I watched the episodes, I kept being surprised by the developments. I look forward to rewatching them knowing what I know now.

When you watch the series bear in mind that it's portraying the early 1960's so you will witness sexual harassment, misogyny, smoking, and drinking in the office.

AMC will begin re-airing the episodes starting mid January. The AMC website shows that the episodes will re-air starting January 21 at midnight Eastern time. I asked Rich Sommer, who plays Harry Crane if this seemed accurate and he didn't think so. I will update the blog when I have the confirmed dates and times.

I guess that's all from the Human for now.

Iowa Campaign


Zim of the Army of 4 asked me about my Iowa campaign--if I was going up there or if the Iowans would be coming to me. That is a very good question. I've decided not to go to Iowa. If you were to ask the fine and noble citizens of Iowa, they would tell you that they are tired of all of the stupid politicians coming up there and annoying them. I pay attention to what I hear. I am not running ads on TV or on the radio because I don't want to annoy the Iowans.

I was born in Iowa, so that makes me the "favorite son." Or something like that.

Not surprisingly, 3 human citizens and 1 canine citizen of the fine State of Iowa are coming to visit me this Sunday.

Zim also asked me if when I'm President there can be an ocean in Kansas. I was asked in a follow up question by Tucker of the Brat Pack if there could also be one in Dallas. I'm happy to announce that the answer to both these questions is "yes." There can be oceans wherever dogs want them...or no oceans where dogs don't want them!

Wednesday, December 26, 2007



First, let me say that my Human is a

And because of that, our part of the county had a power failure. My Human didn't do anything in particular to cause the power failure, but rest assured that it's her fault none the less. And it was after the power failed that my Human discovered that she didn't have but one working flashlights. I told her after our friends in Kansas and Iowa had their power failures that she needed to stock up on batteries and flashlights, but she ignored me! Yeah. It's her fault!

Roo Roo killed a mouse in our house last night. It was a total unexpected surprise!

We all got to gnaw on some big old knuckle bones for Christmas. We each got one. Niki didn't really want hers, though. I decided that it was more fun to stare at Lex and make him nervous while he was chewing on his bone. I got banished to my box for a while. Meepie took Fargo's bone and then mine. Roo Roo took Niki's. Meepie ended up horkaing, so my Humans took the bones back for a while.

Here's some pictures...



Misha Meep

Roo Roo


and even Lex

Monday, December 24, 2007

The Holly & The Ivy





Yingle All The Way


My Human is at her stupid job right now. She is making sure that her employees will be paid at the end of the week.

Hey! Look! It's me!

Hey! Look! It's Roo Roo!

Hey! Look! It's Fargo's butt!

I'm not showing pictures of the others for these reasons.

1. Meepie is bossy. He took my white Cuz.
2. Lex is whiney.
3. Niki got to eat some of my Human's breakfast this morning.

Sunday, December 23, 2007





I haven't put any new pictures of me up lately. So here you go!

Saturday, December 22, 2007



It's snowing here again. And, yes, it is measurable!

New Product


Please allow me to introduce my new cologne Siberian Nights. It's aroma is reminiscent of a pine forest with underlying notes of decaying carcasses.

My cologne makes an excellent stocking stuffer.

Friday, December 21, 2007

Tubey Antoinette


I heard that some human was once told that her citizens were starving. She said that they should eat some cake. Seems like a good idea to me!



My Human claimed there was a mouse in the bathroom this morning. I don't believe her. I guard the entry way to the bathroom each morning when she is in there. This morning I did not. I've never seen a mouse in the bathroom. Well, except for that one that I put my paw on and it decided to die. Anyway, statistically speaking I think that because I never see a mouse when I'm there, the chances of there being one when I'm not there must be miniscule.

So my Human called us to the bathroom and the mouse wasn't there.

Obviously my Human was seeing things. She didn't tell me if the "mouse" was wearing a polo shirt and if it was wrong-side-out.

Thursday, December 20, 2007

Attention to Detail, Part 2


It the spirit of friendship, I've decided to let my Human give you a little more detail to the story I posted in Part 1.

Attention to Detail, Part 1


My Human is stupid. She went to work on Wednesday with her shirt on wrong-side-out. She left for work at 7:30am. Went to a meeting at 1pm and returned to her office at 2:30pm. It was then that she realized that she was improperly dressed. She asked me why we let her leave the house like that. I told her that it gave us something to laugh about while she was gone.

Here is an example of the type of shirt that she was wearing.

For some reason, my Human likes this style of shirt. By the way, her shirt did not have a World of Turbo logo on it, but it should have!

My Human wonders what we do while she's gone. Now, I'm certainly not going to share all our secrets. But in a future Tubey Blog entry I will share info on a game we all enjoy playing.

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Stupid Weather Forecasting


One of our local stupid TV stations weather people claim that we will have
this weekend. What the poopety poop does that mean!?

A millimeter? An inch? A mile? A furlong? A pint?



I had my 25,000th visitor (since I starting keeping track) to my blog. I am declaring Holly Bolly Banana Boo the official 25,000th visitor, although it was actually my Human. In honor of HBBB, I will get to eat some banana in the near future.

Thanks for stopping by everywoo!

Answer To Unasked Question


Tubey, why do you make so much noise when your Human gets home?

Because I'm convinced that if I didn't make all the noise, she'd forget to come in the house and she'd just wander around outside without direction.

Monday, December 17, 2007



So there was a stupid squirrel that ran up the stupid tree. Did you ever notice just how stupid the word "squirrel" is? Look at it: S-Q-U-I-R-R-E-L. Looks to me like there are a bunch of unnecessary letters in that word!

It snowed maybe about 6 inches over the weekend. It was very good. But then it's warming up again and the snow is going away.

I heard a nasty rumor that it'll be 50°F on Christmas Day.

We woke my Human up on Saturday morning at 2:30. We wanted to go out and play in the snow. My Human knows enough about life with Sibes to know that she had to let us play. We wouldn't have let her go back to sleep otherwise!

My Human bought a stupid XM radio. Do any of your humans buy stupid stuff like that? She should have bought more Cuzes. Cuzes are good. XM radios are bad!

Anywoo, back to the squirrel...It ran up the tree when we went out there. It didn't come down. I've never met a squirrel up close and personal. But I think they are stupid.

Sunday, December 16, 2007

Tooth Ache


My Human has a tooth ache. She's had it since she got her tooth fixed a couple weeks ago. I decided to go in for a look. My advice is that she needs to share her breakfast, lunch, supper, and any human snacks with me.