TURBO NEWS NETWORK: Take time to stop and smell the bacon . . . . . . . . .

Friday, May 30, 2008



I read an article about the Democrat Party's Primary in Michigan. Do the resident's of Michigan really prefer to be refered to as Michiganians?


The language of the humans is so strange!

Thursday, May 29, 2008



Rooie and I take turns on who cleans and who supervises. Tonight it was Roo Roo's turn to supervise.

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Dogs In The White House


I found an interesting article on the website of one of the Senators from the state I live in. It tells all about dogs who have lived in the White House. I've not spoken with Senator Bond, but perhaps he would be willing to endorse my Presidential campaign. He seems to be pro-canine.

Here's my favorite part of the article (emphasis mine):

The little Scottie was fed at 7 p.m everyday by [Franklin Delano] Roosevelt after doing tricks for those looking on.

I am very impressed that Fala, the Scottish Terrier, was able to teach FDR to perform a show before dinner. Dinner is always better with entertainment.

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Humans Are Inefficient


Apparently there is a big water leak between the meter and the house. Some humans with machinery will be coming out to dig up the pipes and replace them. I don't understand why we can't just do it ourselves!

Monday, May 26, 2008

Last Remaining US World War I Veteran


In honor of Memorial Day, I am featuring something I found while on my quest to find husky mascots. I have been wanting to honor Frank Buckles for some time, but I can't do it as well as Jade Womack did in the Lasso Online (the student newspaper of George Mason High School).

Relating to the Oldest American Veteran

By Jade Womack (May 26, 2008)

In honor of Memorial Day and the many veterans of our country, Lasso Online has kept this article until now to help Mustangs remember how much we can learn and relate to the courageous soldiers who have fought and will fight for the U.S.A. A few months ago, I had the privilege of meeting Frank Buckles, who is the last surviving World War I soldier in America. Ideally he is the oldest soldier currently in America. He is the single thread that keeps World War I from slipping into secondhand memory. At 107 years old, he has seen so much history firsthand that students at Mason now study in textbooks.

He was eleven when the Titanic sank, “It was big news.” he said. He remarked children that actually read the newspaper at that time. At two years old, Ford Motor Company was created and around seven, the first plastics were invented. He drove the family car when he was twelve and at the bright age of thirteen, he bought his first telegraph. At the age of fifteen, he worked as a bank teller. He bought his first TV in the 1960’s for $100. (The dollar was worth more when he was a child.) He remembers reading several accounts of when the Red Baron was shot down.

At age sixteen, the United States entered World War I and Buckles was eager to join to serve his country. He lied about his age and told them he was eighteen. Since there was no Air Force, his choices were the Army, Navy, or Marines. He applied first to the Marines and was told he was not heavy enough. He then went to the Navy and was turned down because of his flat feet. He then went to two Army recruiting centers. The first time he was again turned down because of his age; he had to be twenty-one. Buckles didn’t give up and went to another center; however, the officer wanted proof of his age. “I said where I came from there weren’t birth certificates.” he notes. The officer believed him, and Buckles was sent to Kansas for training in the ambulance corps. He believed that was the easiest way to get to France.

When on a ship in Norfolk, a fortune teller came aboard and told him that he would have seven good years, then some horrible years. He stated that she was correct for he had seven wonderful years aboard the ship. He had the chance to transfer to another but turned it down because he was happy there. Then World War II broke out and his ship was turned into a merchant ship for the Marines.

Soon after, in the Philippines, he and the crew were captured by the Japanese and spent 39 months as prisoners of war. Although he wasn’t tortured, many around him starved to death. “There was a chap that everyone liked,” Buckles said. “He always tried to be cheerful. But he became weak. He said, ‘Frank, I’m not going to make it.’ The next day, he died. Maybe I made it because I had the will to survive, but many died.”

I asked him about his opinion on all the schedules people have for their lives. He asked “What’s the rush” of today’s instant news, schedules, and information age? Buckles doesn’t have a computer and doesn’t know he has a Wikipedia page. In addition, he does not currently own a television and thinks people watch too much of it. He said one of the problems today is people no longer read.

No one had a driver’s license when he was in his teens. Buckles was able to master the art of driving from the car dealer. However, when he tried to teach his father later, they crashed into their fence because his father kept yelling “Whoa! Whoa!” to the car and did not know how to use the brake.

Church in Buckles day was not only a forum for religion, but a way to socialize. He stated that he used to like this red headed girl, but he couldn’t see her because she went to a different church. “You didn’t call on the telephone.” Back in those days the only way to “flirt” with a girl would be at church.” You could walk her home in front of her parents.” Buckles relates. So he begged his parent to change churches. “And they did!” he said. Then he could walk with her on the way home. He added his advice on love—“Don’t get married until you can afford it.”

I asked him advice he would give today to high school students. “Everyone tries to get rich,” he said. “But money can disappear very quickly. Being rich is a brief situation.” Furthermore, he remarked that people should strive to get a job they enjoy and can support themselves without help from anyone. “A person should never go into anything they don’t like,” he said.

He can remember when he was eighteen and women got the right to vote. He said it wasn’t long ago and it was a good thing. “Yet it [woman being able to vote] should have happened long time ago. There isn’t a thing a man can do that a woman can’t do.”

I asked him: Who was the worst president he lived under and who was the best? He was only eight months old when McKinley was killed, but he was the worst, or at least that was what his parents always told him. The best president was Theodore Roosevelt in his opinion. He knew several of Roosevelt’s children personally.

Nevertheless, he liked John Kennedy because “We needed someone young in there.” When I asked about Nixon, Buckles said, “Nixon might have used bad language, but his foreign policy was fine.” With current politics, he thinks the Iraq conflict is a mistake, “and we have no business being there.”

Yet, how does he survive? The oldest man ever recorded to live was around 120 which Buckles could pass in thirteen years. His secret is exercise. He does around 50 sit-ups every morning while still in bed at 107 years old. He worked on his farm until three years ago and drove his car until he was 100.

When asked about World War I, he stated that his generation had been forgotten. All around the mall there are monuments for World War II, Vietnam, and Korea. Where is World War I’s? “It’s about time.” Time is something that this WWI [veteran] has cherished. He says the secret of his long life was “The will to survive.”

Sunday, May 25, 2008

Repeat: Timing Belt or Siberian Husky? (Redux)


This entry is a repeat of one that I posted a year ago and a year before that.

On Sunday of Memorial Day weekend in 1999, my Human was driving her car around noon and the timing belt broke.

On Saturday of Memorial Day weekend in 2000, my Human decided that Lex needed a friend. She went to the local animal shelter. She originally thought that she wanted to get a female, but none of them appealed to her. She then saw a dog labeled "Cochise." She liked him a lot, so she adopted him. Cochise became Misha Meep. (Below is Meepie's first photo after he came home.)

One year later on Memorial Day weekend 2001, my Human went to the local Farmer's Market and the animal shelter had an information booth. The woman who had handled Meep's adoption was working. My Human thanked her for helping out with Meepie. The woman said that the shelter had a red husky that they were calling Blaze. My Human decided to go over to "look" at the husky and to get information to help find him a home. She visited several times. No one was adopting Blaze, so my Human decided that if he was still there on Wednesday, she would adopt him. He was still there, so on Friday Fargo North Dogkota became a member of the family. (Below is the first photo of Fargo.)

My Human did not get a new Husky during Memorial Day weekend 2002. But that Sunday afternoon around noon her timing belt broke. This was especially stupid because her car had a rebuilt engine put in on the previous Thursday, but the mechanics put the used timing belt on her engine.

Since then my Human has not had to replace any timing belts and she has not added any Huskies during Memorial Day weekend. Now she tries not to drive anywhere at noon on the Sunday before Memorial Day.

Misha MeepFargo North Dogkota

Saturday, May 24, 2008

Husky Logo #72

This is the Oliver Wendell Holmes High School Husky. I don't think he looks much like a husky, however. But I do like the colors green and yellow.

They have a really nice floor, however.

Friday, May 23, 2008



My Human baked some peanut butter cookies last night. But she had to go and ruin them with chocolate chips. That made me think of my favorite joke I ever told. Fargo is the comedian of our house, but I've been known to tell a joke. Here you go...




Thursday, May 22, 2008

Japanese Name Game Thing


Here's the info:

My good bud Thor tagged me for a new game. It's easy and fun for most dogs--you spell out your name in Japanese, using this key:

A - ka, B - tu, C - mi, D -te, E - ku, F - lu, G - ji, H - ri, I - ki, J - zu, K - me, L - ta, M - rin, N - to, O - mo, P - no, Q - ke, R - shi, S - ari, T - chi, U - do, V - ru, W - mei, X - na, Y - fu, Z - zi

I'm not doing me. If you want to find out why I'm not, you can go ahead and do it yourself. Here are the others' names:





If any of woo want to do this game and haven't yet, go ahead and enjoy yourself!

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

2 More!


I am worn out from campaigning, so I will let the pictures tell the story. Tomorrow I will be doing the Japanese Name meme for all of us (except for me).

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Oregon & Kentucky


So they are voting in Oregon and Kentucky today. I've made stops to both states:

But not everyhuman thinks I would make a good President:

I wanted to tell them that they were stupid, but I remembered that my Khampaign Khoordinator Khyra had advised me to me nicer. So this is what I said:

I'm hope that you change and are no longer so stupid.

Monday, May 19, 2008

How To Drive Humans Crazy


On Saturday, Roo Roo stared at nothing for a couple hours. I drove my Human crazy. She kept going outside to see what Rooie was looking at. I laughed at her. We all did!

Sunday, May 18, 2008

Unity College Commencement Speech


Ari's human, Kathryn PhD invited me to give the commencement speech at the school where she teaches. And I got an honorary doctorate, so now I am Doc Tubey. (I've noticed something weird at universities. Most professors last name is PhD. I think it's pronounced "fud." I guess they were bred to be professors. I don't understand humans.)

Here's a picture of me receiving my degree:

This is my speech:
Ari, Kathryn PhD, all other PhD's, family, friends, and especially the new graduates, thank you for inviting me to your graduation. And of course for the doctorate.

My advice for everyone is to not be stupid!

Now, let's eat some cheese and bacon!

After the Unity humans and their friends and families joined me for cheese and bacon, I got my picture taken with some of the graduates:

Saturday, May 17, 2008

Husky Logo #71


Wooo, Huskies of Thomas Hugh Ereckson Middle School in Allen Texas! Your angry looking logo looks like it means business.

I looked over their nutrition page and found that the Ereckson Huskies have a choice of several different menus: Lunch-Blue Plate, Salty Dog Snack Bar, Primo Pizza, Husky Grill, and Breakfast. I choose all of them please! I got excited for a moment because I misread Chef Salad with Turkey as Chef Salad with Tubey!

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Not Human Rights Day


Queen Meeshka informed us that some human bloggers will be celebrating human rights today. I don't have anything wise to say about humans, a species who by nature are not wise. So some of us wise canines have preempted this "holiday" for our own purposes.

Humans make the rules for now, but someday we will be in charge. It is Canine Rights Day! Now, go commandeer the cheese and bacon!

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

NEWV Victory (Vikhtory)!


No one throws a victory party like Malamutes. Holly persuaded Summi to come over from the Island of Iowa to co-host the victory party with her.

I gave a short speech at the party:

Yes, once again the voters have spoken and decided to choose Turbo for President. I have heard that one of the human candidates has declared that he has visited 57 states. Well, I will visit at least 75 states! Now everyone say with me what time it is...IT'S TIME FOR CHEESE AND BACON!!!

Monday, May 12, 2008

West Virginia & Nebraska Campaign


I've been busy on the campaign trail in West Virginia and Nebraska. I'm sure you will all agree that the scenery in West Virginia is just as nice as that in North Carolina:

I stopped by West Virginia State University to greet my supporters:

Sadly, not every human was receptive to me:

In Nebraska, Holly was in charge of the campaign stops. Here's a picture that Summi took of Holly, my Khampaign Khoordinator, and me in front of Carhenge:

I gave a short speech at that campaign stop:

I am against the higher fuel costs and for finding alternative sources of energy. Now, let's eat cheese and bacon!

Sunday, May 11, 2008

The Me Me Meme


Marley the Woo Hat tagged me in a pawesome game...here are the rules:

*Write your own six word memoir.
*Post it on your blog and include a visual illustration if you’d like.
*Link to the person that tagged you in your post, and to the original post if possible so we can track it as it travels across the blogosphere.
*Tag at least five more blogs with links.
*Don’t forget to leave a comment on the tagged blogs with an invitation to play.
*Have fun!!

So, without further ah-woo:







I think most everydog has meme'd by now. But if you haven't, DO IT! This includes you, Ari!

Friday, May 09, 2008

20% Less!


My dog food costs as much this week as it did 2 weeks ago. But there is 20% less in the bag. This is very stupid! I guess they figured humans wouldn't notice that they weren't getting as much. Let me illustrate the difference:

To summarize: More is better!

Thursday, May 08, 2008



What do you do when you are outside? The picture below is what I do when I'm outside and my Human closes the door. I especially do this when my Human is inside with that stupid Lex!

I have a couple pending blog entries that I need to work on: the me me meme (that Marley tagged me to do) and my startling results of dogs who have lived in the White House. But I have to supervise my Human. Her back is hurting her. I told her that her back wouldn't be hurting if she gave up that stupid bi-ped gait of hers!