TURBO NEWS NETWORK: Take time to stop and smell the bacon . . . . . . . . .

Sunday, September 16, 2007

The Truth About Humans


We all have to live around humans. Some are better than others, but they are all stupid and they are all lazy. Humans would prefer to sit on their butts in chairs rather than get up and enjoy a nice game of furniture olymics or wrestling.

We canines are blessed with 4 legs, which give us great speed. Humans, on the other hand, have only 2 legs and they are very slow compared to us.

When we dig holes, we use our paws. Humans use big, stupid construction equipment!

And Humans sit on their butts to travel great distances! What sense does that mean?

Many humans go to a place they call "work" each week day leaving their canine companions behind. And what do lots of these humans do? They sit on their butts in chairs!

Humans in any job they hold are more happy to sit on their butts than actually do any work. Strangely (in most cases) the less physically active a human is in his or her job, the more money they earn!

And if a human has a choice between taking the word of another human or getting out of a chair and checking on something for his or herself, the human will chose to just sit and trust!

I strongly believe we can exploit these character flaws in our favor. What do you all think?


Anonymous said...

Oh Turbo... what a well through post for today. First the picture is lovely!!! Second, you are SOOO true. i sure wish mom would join me in on some furniture olympics. Sometimes she chases me around the house, but she could jump over the coffee table every now and again, ha roo!

Steve, Kat, & Wilbur said...

That is a good picture of you Turbo. Why do humans also not understand that running and wrestling in the house is so much better than running and wrestling in the back yard?


Khady Lynn said...

Our humans are pretty lazy too. Mom is always sitting in the darn recliner with the laptop on her lap. She does chase Samuel around the house sometimes, but he has to annoy her for a good while before she actually gets up.

And stupid? Oh heck yes, they are ALL stupid. The world would be in so much better condition if we dogs were in charge!


Kapp pack said...

I agree 100%. Think of how much better this world would be if humans expended the amount of energy we do in a day.....hmmm...on second thought...I spend most of the day sleeping....maybe not a good idea for the humans. I need to eat and have a roof over my head...I just wish I could go to work with mom or dad.

Woo woo, Kelsey Ann

Joe Stains said...

This was quite revealing, you are so insightful!

The Brat Pack said...

You are pure genius. 110% right on all accounts.