TURBO NEWS NETWORK: Take time to stop and smell the bacon . . . . . . . . .

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Startling Human Expose


My Human wore a sleepy-shirt to work today!

She hired this man from the 1950's with a slight resemblence to President Bush to explain herself:

But I knew. And I was embarrassed.

And worse yet, my Human was actually bragging about it to Marley and Ziggy's mom!

Florida Update


As you all should know, I won the Florida Primary. But you should also know that the stupid election laws have declared that it doesn't count. It's all just very stupid!

Anyway, thank to all my supporters in Florida who voted for me just to make a point. A special thanks goes out to Mrs. Smith who ran my phone bank operations in Florida, spreading the Turbo word.

Now I am on to Maine where Ari has erected a statue of me near the Paul Bunyan statue. My statue is called "Tube, the Blue Sibe."

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Interuption Of The Campaign


I had to fly home from Florida yesterday because my Human was going to put a new roll of toilet paper on the thingie in the bathroom. I always get the old tube and I didn't want to let my Human down.

This is pretty much what always happens.

1. I hear the sounds indicating the TP roll will be changed.
2. I run to the bathroom.
3. My Human gives me the old tube.
4. I run to the bedroom and hop on the bed to destroy the tube.
5. Roo Roo stares at me till I am irritated.

Here's some shots of yesterday's actions:

Monday, January 28, 2008

Having A Good Time Campaigning...


...wish you were here!

I was disappointed at first that the white stuff on the beaches was not snow, but it's fun to dig in it!

Sunday, January 27, 2008

Meepie's Collar


Meepie decided he didn't want his collar any more on Friday evening. He chewed it off:

My Human got a little worked up about it, but I don't know why. Meepie gave it back 2 days later.

Anywoo, Meepie will be getting a new collar. We use the Lupine brand. My Human has been looking at them online to get an idea of what type to get. I think she should ask Meepie!

Here's the "before" picture of the collar & Meepie:

Success in South Carolina


Yet another Turbo Victory. But my Khampaign Khoordinator Khyra had to step between me and some stupid loudmouthed chickens that were yelling a bunch of stupid stuff at me. The chickens were insistant that I am anti-poultry! Me!? I love having chicken for dinner every night!

So, thanks to all the non-stupid South Carolinans who realize that this dog is the real candidate for change!

I am now on to Florida and then up to Maine!

Here's a picture of me to tide you over until the next picture of me:

Saturday, January 26, 2008

Husky Logo #55


I'm moving! I'm moving to the place with the coolest Coat of Arms and the coolest flag. I am moving north. I am moving to the Yukon in Canada!!!!!!

This is what the Yukon government says about the Coat of Arms (emphasis mine):

The Yukon Coat of Arms is a red, blue, gold and white shield surmounted by a malamute (or husky) standing on a mound of snow.

Wavy vertical white and blue stripes represent the Yukon River and the gold-bearing creeks of the Klondike. Red spire-like forms represent the territory's mountains and the gold circles within symbolize mineral resources. At the top of the shield is a cross of St. George in recognition of the early English explorers and a "roundel in vair" as a symbol of the fur trade.

And here's more words from them about the flag:

The Yukon flag has three vertical panels: a green panel on the inner edge, a central panel of white and a blue panel on the outer edge. The Yukon Coat of Arms appears on the central panel framed by two stems of fireweed. The green symbolizes the forests, white signifies snow and the blue represents Yukon's rivers and lakes.

Friday, January 25, 2008



I don't know if you've seen the negative ad the chickens have. But I decided to hit them where they'd see it!

Thursday, January 24, 2008

Big In Ukraine


I've had more than one hit to my blog recently by Ukrainians attracted to this:

Here's what I say to my new Ukrainian friends: "дуже добрий!"

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Album Tag


So the Army of 4 posted about a new, fun tag game. Here's the rules:

First, go to THIS website... the title of the first article that comes up is the name of your band!

Next, go to THIS website... look at the last quote on the page, the last 4 words of that quote are the name of your album!

Then, go to THIS website and look at the 3rd picture... that's the art for your album cover!

Okay, so the first one I pulled up didn't work for me. But because I'm such a generous guy, I gave it to Roo Roo. She's very proud of her band, Pink Collar Worker:

Then there's me and my band, Bull Point:

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Interactive Technology


I am ignoring that stupid chicken and stupid vacuum. You all know that chickens are stupid, so why should I acknowledge them? They are delicious, though.

So what I'm going to do instead is show you a couple of exhibits from my H.A. Turbofire Interactive Technology Center. If you are interested in visiting it, you will find it at our house. But only while my Human is at her stupid job. She gets irritated when visitors stop by to see the exhibit.

Here is the Turbo Tech Towers:

And here is the Turbo Touch Screen TV:

Monday, January 21, 2008

Chickens & Vacuums Are Stupid!


My Khampaign Khoordinator Khyra let me know that there is something nefarious on that stupid vacuum's blog. Look, we all know vacuums are stupid and so are chickens. It's not my fault. And, anyway, didn't I invite the chickens over for dinner?

I'm just a cute little puppy, I don't know why anyone would have a problem with me!

Sunday, January 20, 2008

Sunday Thoughts


I heard from Joe Stains that Tadpole is also running for President. I don't have a problem with this. I've made the statement before that their is nothing in the Constitution that says that more than 1 dog can't be President at the same time. It's true!

I wanted to inform you that I picked up another nice donation. This one for $3,765,456.21.

My Nevada human supporters gave me a nice send off rally before I left town:

After the rally, we sat down for a nice chicken dinner.

Saturday, January 19, 2008

Tube Wolf Nevada Victory!


Without further ado, here's Khampaign Khoordinator Khyra!

Our khampaign netted yet another vikhtory! The non-stoopid voters of Nevada rolled the dice and they khame up Tubey Eyes!

And here's some words from me...

Thank woo to all my supporters once again. It looks like the Tubey Train went over the Rocky Mountains and picked up momentum. I think it'll pick up more momentum as we cross again on our way to South Carolina! Woo!!

Husky Logo #54


A long time ago, even before my Human was born there was a professional basketball** team in Toronto, Ontario. They called them selves the Huskies. They played the first NBA game ever against the New York Knickerbockers on November 1, 1946.

The team only lasted 2 seasons before they folded.

Then in 1995, Toronto got a new professional basketball team. But they were stupid and called the team the Raptors.

There's a small movement to get the team to regain their original, superior name. I hope they succeed.

**For the record, I prefer American football to basketball. It's more husky-like.

Friday, January 18, 2008



Fargo has a wounded face. Theoretically speaking, maybe his face ended up in my mouth. Maybe my tooth punctured his face. Maybe.

But I'm not admitting to anything.

There is no proof.

It's No Gamble!


Things are looking good for the Tube Wolf in Nevada! Doggonally I think that gambling is a stupid human activity, but if you're looking for a sure bet, vote for Turbo!

After the win I'll get in Nevada this Saturday, I'll be heading on out to South Carolina. I've heard there are a bunch of loud mouth chickens out there. I'm hoping to have one over for dinner. Ha ha!

Look at this yard sign I saw in the yard of an intellegent human:

Thursday, January 17, 2008

Thinking Blogger Award


Thank woo Sitka and Echo for giving me the Thinking Blogger award. I'm sorry I didn't post it quicker.

Here's the deal:

It's called The Thinking Blogger Award. It is given to Blogs which make readers think. Wow - we are having such a wonderful time blogging and are so touched that so many seem to enjoy reading what we have to say. With this honor comes the responsibility of passing this award on to five other Blogs. The criteria is as follows:

1. You must write a post with links to 5 blogs that make you think

2. Acknowledge this post.

3. Optional: Proudly display the Thinking Blogger Award with a link to the post that you wrote.

4. Go tell your humans to fork over the treats!

I'm going to give it to the members of the SiberMal Society. Woo know who woo are!

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Puppy Bowl!


The fine individuals at Animal Planet have announced that the Puppy Bowl will be returning this year to air opposite of the human's Super Bowl. When is it? It's February 3, 2008 starting at 3pm Eastern whatever time.

It's even going to be in High Definition!

In case you can't wait till then to see a cute puppy, here's a picture of me:

Stupid News Story


I read a stupid news story about some stupid human scientists who claim that they have developed a computer to translate barks into their stupid human language. The scientists are especially proud of the fact that their stupid computers can tell when a dog is barking about a stranger or that they want to fight...


I hate to admit that my Human is not stupid about something, but she doesn't need a stupid computer to tell her when I'm yelling that I see a stranger or that I think I'm going to have to fight!

In closing, all humans are stupid, but apparently mine is not the most stupid one!

And here's a picture of me:

Victorious in Michigan


And now I have a win in Michigan! Thank you to all my supporters who have helped me with yet another win against all humans.

Specifically I want to thank Sitka and Echo for giving me the Thinking Blogger award. I will post about that separately. Woo!

And here is my Khampaign Khoordinator, Khyra to summarize:

Well, I knew it would be a great day and another vikhtory for Tubie when the weather dogs khooperated - nothing says vikhtory like snow in the morning!

Now we''ll off to Nevada for another lukhky roll of the dice!

Monday, January 14, 2008

Hop On The Turbo Train


I thought you may like to see how I'm getting to the places I'm campaigning in. There is room for all of you on the Turbo Express.

All aboard!

It goes without saying that the Turbo Express serves lots of treats, including, steak, cheese, and bacon.

I expect to do well in the Michigan Primary for a bunch of reasons. It's a northern state and I'm a northern breed, for just 1.

What's the weather forecast for Michigan tomorrow? Cool with a 100% chance of Turbo victory!


I am reminded of a post I did back on September 6, 2006. The words of the fight song of Portage Northern High School in Portage, Michigan are still inspiring!

Go Portage Northern,
go you Huskies go

We are ever loyal,
as we go to meet the foe

Rah Rah Rah!

Win Northern Huskies,
victory is our aim

Go brown and white team,
show them our fight team

We are going to win this game

Sunday, January 13, 2008

For Joe Stains: Turbo Tax


Yes, it is my tax.

Family Bones


My Human's father grew up in the Badlands of South Dakota. When he was 16 years old, he was wandering around on the ranch and found a bone. He knew enough to realize that it might be a dinosaur bone. Turns out it was. So the palentologist came and dug it up. At first it was identified as a brontosauraus, but later it was determined that it was some other type of similar dinosaur. My Human's father's family didn't get any money from the dinosaur.

The bones are shoved into some boxes in storage at the South Dakota School of Mines & Technology. I think they should give them to me!

Saturday, January 12, 2008

Husky Logo #53


This weeked I am paying homage to the Huskies of Centennial High in Corona, California.

This message for huskies was on their daily bulletin:

Hey Huskies! Centennial Annual Talent Show is this Friday! We have some great acts this year so invite everyone you know. All are welcome! $3 pre-sale w/ASB & $8 without. At the door, $4 w/ASB & $8 w/o. Doors open at 6. Show starts at 6:30. See you there!

But sadly I think we've missed our opportunity as I think it was to be held on January 11, 2008.

I also found the husky logo below. I will admit that it scares me!

Friday, January 11, 2008

Fargo Friday


My Human once took Fargo to the salon that she gets her hair worked on. She wanted to get highlights his fur color. So, they matched the sample up to Fargo's color.

My Human's hair is just slightly darker than Fargo's.

Humans are weird. And stupid.

Thursday, January 10, 2008

Meepie is Mean!


Dr. Misha Meepenstein is mean. If some other dog has a toy or bone or pretty much anything, Meepie will go over and take it. Then he will sit with the object(s) in front of him and just glare at everydog else. Meepie doesn't necessarily want to play with the item, but he wants to control the situation.

Wednesday, January 09, 2008

(Go Ahead) Make My Day Award


Big Tubey-style thanks to Holly and Prince & Summer for giving me the "make my day" award. I really appreciate it! Woo!

The rules are to pass the award along to up to 10 bloggety bloggers whose blog brings you happiness & inspiration and makes you feel happy about the blogging world.

Here's the 10 I'm giving it to. I love many, many more blogs, but I'm limited to just 10. And because I'm not keeping track of who has already received them, some bloggety bloggers may be getting duplicate from me.

Marley, the Marlerator
M2 O apostrophe B
Tierre, the Human

I'm tired and I'm going to bed. I'll be stopping by each of these blogs soon to give them this most excellent award!


Domestic Issues


There has been a war at the Turbo House. It is the Huskies versus the mice. The mice decided to infiltrate the house. They retreated from the outside where feral cats patrol. They took up residence in the pantry. We've seen them scurrying around, going from the kitchen to the bathroom and back. My Human thoroughly cleaned the kitchen and discovered that none of her food had been broached...as far as she could tell.

We have had some success against the rodents. Roo Roo has killed 2, although Lex took one and tried to claim the victory as his. Then Lex killed 1 while I was outside surveying the parameter. But I feel the need to announce that my Human had to point it out to him.

For this operation I have been serving in the capacity of Commander in Chief.

Win In New Hampshire!


Thank you, all of you fine citizens of New Hampshire for your support! We are continuing to send a strong message to the human candidates that my campaign is the only one that can deliver change. No one can stop our campaign now!

We now travel to Michigan, then Nevada, and then South Carolina.

Finally, here is my Khampaign Khoordinator Khyra's khomments:

At this time, I khan't add anything to what Turbo has said. Having listened to all the human babbling throughtout the evening, once again our khandidate shows he truly means change. There is no need to run on and on - except for time spent on the trail - when a few words will do. Now, let's mush on to Michigan.,

Monday, January 07, 2008

That's Not Change!


I think you'll all agree with me that if a human is voted to be the President this year, that's not change!

If the next President walks on only 2 legs, that's not change!

If the next President is anyone other than Tubey, that's not change!

Birds Are Stupid


Still the #1 search term that gets people to my blog is "birds in the attic." When I originally posted about it, I had no clue that this was something that people would be concerned about. We've not had any birds in our attic for well over a year now. They usually show up in the spring and early summer. We let them stay up there. There's no way my Human's going to crawl up into the attic just to evict some stupid birds!

So there!

I've also had a ton of people wander to my blog today searching for info on the American Gladiators. My Human has mixed emotions about the new American Gladiator show. She loved the original show 20 years ago, but she has no desire to watch this new one. She probably will watch it though. It's probably better for her than American's Next Top Model marathons!